“It's time for me to be honest here, and it's not going to be easy, as it's something I've worked tirelessly at over the last year. My anxiety and constant focus on my voice have gotten me to a place where the joy of performing has been taken away from me.
“I got to a place where, whenever I go to scream, the voice inside my head stops me from being able to do the job that l've done for the last 20 or so years.
“Now, this isn't something that I started. It's been the online discourse around my voice and the constant judgment that have ultimately led me down a tunnel that I've struggled to get out of
“It got really loud after Rock am Ring, where I had a really tough day trying out a new technique in front of 90-odd thousand people. The more I tried, the crueler the comments over the summer got, and it led me to a place where I was physically and emotionally shot. My performance anxiety had gotten out of control, and I wasn't able to enjoy anything about the band or being on stage.
“Since summer, I've worked tirelessly to try and get to a point where my scream feels back to where it belongs. I would like to thank David from Extreme vocal academy for his help with this and for trying to help me unlock the part of me that has been lost under all the negativity.
“I want to take this time to say that everything I've been doing, and the stress I'm putting on myself, is ultimately making it and my mental health worse and got me to a place where the people that love me are worried. I've been in bits today describing exactly how I feel and how the weight of it all has got too much. My band mates and wife have been so supportive over the last year I can't begin to tell you how loved I feel but it's time to let you guys in on how much it's crushing me.
“The comments and the judgment have got too much. I'm a human being trying my hardest up there, and some things aren't going to be perfect. I'm in therapy every week and on medication to help my anxiety. Trust me when I say there isn't a stone I haven't left unturned.
“I didn't grow up with perfect technique. I grew up screaming and barely being able to hear myself, playing in front of nobody.
“So this is me being honest and letting go.
“I dreamt of having a "Sam's Back" moment, but that's not real life. And maybe this is actually my moment to come back to a life where I'm not thinking about this shit every waking moment.
“On this tour with Korn, I'm going to scream the words from a place of passion and determination. Ultimately, I want to get back to a place where I'm having fun with my friends on stage. It's not going to be perfect, but I'm not, so that's that.
“Be kind you never know what someone is truly going through.
Love
Sam”
was als 16 jarige ooit een beetje verliefd op Andy (lol) dus wilde ze heel graag een keer zien, maar ik ben er van overtuigd dat ie stijf stond van de drugs. Hij was constant aan het 'kauwen'. Misschien was ik daar zo op afgeknapt dat ik de rest van de show ook niks meer vond idk. Was leuk om te kunnen afstrepen, maar als ze op graspop staan sta ik waarschijnlijk ergens anders
het was wel door mn hoofd geschoten, maar het leek me sterk dat je kauwgum in je mond zou hebben tijdens het zingen. Ach ja, eerst maar eens zien of ze er staan, en hoe het dan qua clashes uitkomt
